Mavic Phantom Drone

Imaging Above Everything

Talk About It As If It Were Art

Yesterday I lamented over what I was going to do. And that is the thing, I am not going to do it because it is already done. I can’t take it back. I am already who I am and no matter what I do now, I cannot change any of the things that I have chosen in the past so I can leave it in the past or talk about it. I have bitterly tried to resist being vulnerable with my audience choosing not to share who I Am because it is known “we” don’t do that. “We” need our privacy. But I don’t really believe that.  The reality is that I have never been the type to be so disinvested. I like to share. I go all in. I am all invested, all encompassed, and I give one hundred percent if I care about the endeavor. I do not fail. I might not get it right the first one hundred and sixty-two times but there is always another try. I do not quit, and I honestly like that about me. I am beyond resilient, and you can’t hold me down for shit.

That is why we are here right now. I’ve wanted to share this lifestyle but I feared making others uncomfortable for such a long time. Much of what we do is very misunderstood. Most of us don’t talk about what we do very candidly and that for us as a whole is very detrimental. We live a dual life that is often complicated, dishonest and deceiving. The reason I fell in love with sex work is because of all the people I got to connect with and for me that was meaningful. You really don’t know what others go through until they reveal it to you and so often in those quiet spaces you got to see them when they were truly naked and vulnerable. No this wasn’t all the time but it happened for me more often than it did not and I know I am fortunate for that because some of us don’t have such fond memories of our sex work and that’s the only part people show. I have many fond memories of many of my clients and some of them I loved. 

I think more than not the reason I had so many repeat customers was because of that. I know damn well I wasn’t the best looking nor best in bed and there were so many things I didn’t do in regard to sex that they would request. I had so many rules but none when it came to whether or not I would be vulnerable with you in that moment and then disappear when it was necessary. I was so good at that; loving them, and then being gone like it had never happened. I think so many men needed that. They just needed to feel safe. They needed to not feel used while in the same breath using me to fill that empty gap. If I admit I liked that, people will consider me damaged goods, but should I feel damaged for not wanting to be responsible for another person’s feelings or moods all of the time and just wanting to share the times that are good? It might sound completely strange to you but it’s not odd to me; just wanting to be wanted for a moment but then wanting to get back to your peace and solitude or space that you hold just for you discretely.

I do not desire to be responsible for another person’s well-being and I have accepted that. I have come to learn myself and that myself doesn’t like to be monogamous because I am not able to emotionally carry them, I have to be honest; I am poor at that.  And would you believe that you can be with your partner for more than forty years and realize you still don’t know them and that to them you are a chameleon? That they don’t know you and are still learning you to this very moment because you keep changing; how endearing. But it gave me peace that there is no one way to love someone and you should not make love a prison because of what you need in your heart as you have no clue what is in theirs. And while yes, you have them, when you go through your shit you often go through that shit alone. At that moment you are alone, and they don’t experience what you experience, and you often aren’t honest with them about that. They can support you but they won’t be there in the thick of it.

 I have as much empathy for others as they pity my life; due to what they sacrifice to get the very thing I don’t have yet don’t envy because it is a hell of a responsibility to have and have chosen not to carry. You have to let that other person be free to express who they are even if and when you don’t agree with it. You can’t go with them, through life, the inner part is a solo journey; we all hold more than half of our true thoughts deep inside. I didn’t understand that part until yesterday. But I now understand better why I don’t want to hold that place for anybody. And truthfully, I don’t have to, either. 

So, in as much that this is the blog of a sex worker, a companion, a free-spirited and dominant woman by nature I want to confess how caged up I have felt because I didn’t want to make others uncomfortable with my experience. I felt embarrassed about the shallow life I live but after realizing from someone else just how deep it truly has been. 

People view sex workers as people that don’t have feelings. They think we just sell ourselves and, in a way, we do but don’t we all when we are trying to get people to buy the shit we are selling? I never felt that more than applying for regular jobs and seeing the regular wages LOL. I don’t really want to have to hide who I am or where I have been so in that time I had to really decide if I was going to remain Ms. Phoenix Rising.

If you ever wonder, why we stay in business I expect you to look so much deeper than the supposed ease of sex work because it’s not easy. Yea, men like sex but men can get sex for free most of the time but with that freedom comes other expenses and that freedom is taxed beyond belief and some just don’t want to buy that. So many of you will want to find reasons to be emotional and I get that, but would you believe some people are just tired and feel more emotions are taxing? Yea. That. We all have a lot of shit going on. So much is under the surface and few of us talk about it yet, we want to feel we belong. Someone told me I could take up space any fucking place I wanted, respectfully and nobody could stop me. Even if I came in as Mistress Phoenix (sort of lol).

 Everyone wants to feel valued, loved, and respected. We stay in business because not everyone gets that. Most of us sell a dream. Most of us live in a reality that you never get to see in our shown fantasy. You probably don’t want to either… otherwise you’d have to tap in and connect. And that’s not easy when neither of you really want to get naked. I like being nude. I like to be seen but sometimes I Am embarrassed by that same vulnerability, but I guess I am over that. I have so many women to thank for that and these are women that just came along that have shown me the greatest compassion. Can you understand how yea, it’s that powerful someone would actually pay for it?

 Now, they gave unto me freely. I just want to give that same compassion back. If you come across these pages understand that our world is not just white or black but outsiders can’t see this so let me help to paint you much clearer picture so you can talk about it as poignantly as I do as if it were art. There is beauty in all things, and I want to find it in us.

Trending Posts

No Posts Found!


  • Reprehenderit illo et optio quod et Velit quod alias voluptas tenetur reiciendis sed Magni nesciunt voluptas est dolor voluptatem doloribus. et assumenda aut totam. Illo qui iusto Ut iste vel ipsam quae praesentium. Nostrum modi suscipit expedita voluptatem id. Et laboriosam eaque dolor doloribus. Omnis est inventore dolorem ullam dolor reprehenderit perferendis. quibusdam nihil consectetur illo tempore. Accusamus unde quae Voluptatibus magni totam facilis accusantium.

  • Sit aut nihil beatae qui totam. Blanditiis dolor et tempore dolor. Itaque voluptate ut perferendis commodi unde quis. Commodi quod quo minima nihil facere. incidunt assumenda est eum reprehenderit Nostrum eum dicta quidem quis reiciendis. Modi inventore et ea Dolores quidem rerum at et. et ducimus non illo quia. vel placeat sed. non possimus sit esse nemo. Facere consequatur natus id. blanditiis officiis tempore modi fugit.

Leave a Reply

  • All Post
  • Discipline Training
  • Lifestyle & Living
  • Uncategorized

Deep Blue
Air Balloons

Edit Template
Featured Posts

No Posts Found!

Never miss any important news. Subscribe to our newsletter.

You have been successfully Subscribed! Ops! Something went wrong, please try again.





Extreme Sport

Living Lifestyle

Culture & Fashion


About Us



Work For Blogs

Video Files

Our Store

More Info

Term Of Use

Privacy Police

Advertise With Us



License Footage

© 2022 Created with Royal Elementor Addons